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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25258150">Your eyes</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/GetNight/pseuds/GetNight'>GetNight</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Suits (US TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Character Death, Grief/Mourning, Heart Attacks, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Memories</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-14</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 06:22:37</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,261</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25258150</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/GetNight/pseuds/GetNight</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>-Harvey, I didn't get a chance to say good-bye. I didn't have time to say what I hadn't dared to say for years. What I put off because I never thought that one day Donna would just call and say: "He's dead, Mike". I never thought I'd hear this, you know? - Mike shouted into the distance. There was an overwhelming desperation in his voice. — You can laugh at me, but I always thought it would be like in the movies. You know, happy old age, senile jokes and…</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Mike Ross/Harvey Specter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>17</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Your eyes</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>IT'S FUCKING GLASS. NATURAL. TOO DRAMATIC. DON'T EVEN ASK. I SAW A LOT OF SAD IDIOTS ON MARVEY AND ... THAT'S IT, I WENT ON TO CHOKE ON TEARS, BECAUSE I FLOODED THE ENTIRE COMPUTER WITH THEM WHILE I WAS WRITING. KILL ME.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Mike stood motionless. In the obscenely expensive suit, that Harvey had made him buy. He tightens his fists and looks up from the ground. Many people. So many eyes. Someone is crying, someone is staring blankly in front of him, someone is glaring at him. Mike catches Donna's eye. Tears are streaming from her eyes. She nods, inviting him to say something. But he doesn't say anything. He's silent, trying to find something... something to say. Mike is afraid to turn his head and see something, that will definitively confirm that all this is not a dream. Not a damn dream, Mike. This is reality. He takes a deep breath, but the tears continue to choke him.</p>
<p>
  <em>You can do it, Rookie. Come on, don't you have anything to say to me?</em>
</p>
<p>	That voice... Harvey? Mike looks around the clearing where everything happens. He sees it. Harvey. Standing there, among all the guests, smiling as if nothing had happened. Smug and arrogant. Is he hallucinating? He's definitely standing there.</p>
<p>
  <em>Mike, look at me.</em>
</p>
<p>	Mike looks directly into Harvey's eyes. He nods.</p>
<p>
  <em>You can.</em>
</p>
<p>	He doesn't hold back anymore. Tears run freely down his face. Take a deep breath, let it out, look at Harvey again, and nod again. He can. He must.<br/>— I… — Mike finally says through his tears. — You know, when I first met Harvey, I was scared to death. I dropped a whole bunch of weed right at his feet. I thought, he'd call the cops right away, — he tries to smile, but the endless tears won't let him. Mike looks for Donna. She tries to smile, too, remembering that day. — But he… he didn't. For some reason, he didn't. For some reason, he asked me to tell the whole story. Then he hired me. An uneducated drug addict, who literally tried to break the law in front of him, — Mike sobs and puts his hand over his mouth, trying to hold back the sobs.</p>
<p>
  <em>Seriously? Best thing you can remember?</em>
</p>
<p>	He looks up and sees Harvey's eyes scrutinizing him with their usual grin. Mike takes another deep breath.<br/>— We started, as a boss and subordinate, continued, as a mentor and student, and ended, as friends and brothers. Hell, he never admitted it, but we're friends. Real. He... No, you. You, Harvey. You can hear me. I know. And I tell you, I would trust you with my life. You've fought for me too many times. You fought for everyone in the firm. You protected us all. Me, Donna, Jessica, Louis, Rachel... all of them. You taught me everything, I know. You were the best mentor in the world, the best friend, and... a best person. You always said, life was like this, — he says, making a Harvey's signature gesture. — You want like this. And, damn it, your life was way beyond, what you wanted. I once said you were a good man. But, I'll say it again. You're not good, you're the best. And, —  tears welled up in Mike's eyes, and he just paused for a couple of seconds.<br/>	He suddenly fell to his knees on the ground. In the expensive trousers that Harvey had chosen, which would be ruined. Mike pressed his hands to his face, and sobs broke from his chest. He felt a warm hand on his shoulder and looked up. Harvey. Harvey was smiling. Sincerely, without ridicule. Just smile.</p>
<p>
  <em>Full sentences, right?</em>
</p>
<p>	Mike looked at him with tearful eyes. Then he turned and, without getting up from his knees, continued:<br/>— Yes. Full sentence. Exactly. You always said that, Harvey. And... my memory. You know for sure, I remember every moment, every memory. I remember everything. I remember the first time, I heard you compare me to a puppy. I was so hurt then, but now… I'm going to miss this, Harvey. I remember, how scared I was, when Jessica found out my secret and you calmed me down. If it's yours: "Stop panicking!" — you can call it that, — Mike smiled. — I remember, how we kicked Travis Tanner's ass, how we quoted movies, how you... Oh, gods, how you put Katrina in her place, how we fought in Sidwell's time, and... Even then, you were damn near there, when I needed you. I remember, how Louis found out about me, how I was arrested, how we fought Gibbs... you can go on and on. I remember everything, Harvey.</p>
<p>
  <em>Me too, Mike. I will always remember. Even without your memory.</em>
</p>
<p>	Mike still feels the weight of a warm hand on his shoulder. Is he going mad? Spit. It hurts too much to think about it. It was like taking a piece of his soul. It was as if a part of him had been stripped away. It's like... you just broke his heart. Broke Mike Ross. Total. Completely.<br/>— Harvey, I didn't get a chance to say good-bye. I didn't have time to say, what I hadn't dared to say for years. What I put off because I never thought, that one day Donna would just call and say: "He's dead, Mike". I never thought, I'd hear this, you know? — Mike shouted into the distance. There was an overwhelming desperation in his voice. — You can laugh at me, but I always thought it would be, like in the movies. You know, happy old age, old jokes, and… — he stopped, choking back a sob.</p>
<p>
  <em>You, as always, Mike. Pink dreams of a teenage girl.</em>
</p>
<p>	He bites his lip. He needs someone to look at him. Anyone.<br/>— Mike, — Donna calls from the audience. Her eyes continue to water.<br/>— We're with you, — Rachel says.<br/>— You're not alone, Mike, — Louis is looking right at him.<br/>— Harvey wasn't alone. And you too, —  Jessica, who is also fighting back tears, smiles at Mike.<br/>	Mike nods, bracing himself again.<br/>— Do you know, what's wrong with my memory? I remember every detail, of when I saw it. Harvey. Dead. Shot through the stomach. At that moment… I hated the whole world. Each person. He just lay there, in his eyes was no...  — he tries to find the words. — There was nothing. Usually, there's complacency, arrogance, concern, whatever, but... this time, it was an empty look. Lifeless. I... I just wanted to hit my head or die. I still do. This is too much, — Mike whispers the last words. — I actually promised, I would never say this, when I accepted that job offer, but I do. Because… Because it's too much, Harvey! — he's sure who he's talking to. And this heart-rending cry should have really broken the heart of everyone present. — I can't… Please! I remember wanting to throw myself against the wall back in the hospital, when I saw that look. This look is always incredibly fascinating brown eyes. Yes, Harvey, did you know? that your eyes are beautiful? I could stare at them for hours.</p>
<p>
  <em>Mike. Look at me.</em>
</p>
<p>	Mike turned.</p>
<p>
  <em>Your eyes are a million times more beautiful. Did you know that?</em>
</p>
<p>	Mike shudders. He can't breathe. At all. He's just suffocating. The end. Full stop. His eyelids grow heavy, and loud sobs come from his chest. He hears people begin to crowd around him. He feels the damp earth under his head. Donna is shouting something. Rachel calls an ambulance. But all Mike sees is Harvey. Harvey is kneeling next to him.</p>
<p>
  <em>Mike, you have to move on.</em>
</p>
<p>— I can't, Harvey, — Mike mouthes.</p>
<p>
  <em>Mike…</em>
</p>
<p>— No, I can't. I... I ... I love you, Harvey.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em><strong>Patient:</strong> Michael James Ross<br/><strong>Information:</strong> Death occurred at 14: 45, 05.10.2017.<br/><strong>Diagnosis:</strong> Heart attack<br/><strong>Reasons:</strong> Not known</em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Too dramatic? Yes. And I did. A heart attack can actually occur from severe mental pain. Actually, I didn't put a "happy ending" or "bad ending"label on it. Because... I mean, they're doing well. They are together. Somewhere... where people go after death. But it's different for everyone.<br/>A couple of links to my favorite videos on Marvey (they are not all sad):<br/>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A0SOYQZmRBQ<br/>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=62_gA_XqHX4 - my favorite since 1: 23. Let's see if you like Marvey.<br/>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9e1wkt7radE<br/>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RjiCJC7zd9c - you have to see it.<br/>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U80JLEPPo7c&amp;t=7s<br/>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aysoCWzT204<br/>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Fxl-MGisQQ<br/>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aysoCWzT204&amp;t=73s<br/>God, there was somewhere else where their kiss was mounted, but... who's a sucker? I'm a sucker who lost the link.<br/>I'm looking forward to your feedback</p></blockquote></div></div>
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